I did have a full Christmas blurb prepared, extolling the myriad virtues of Mince Pies and the joys of bad jokes in Christmas crackers, but I feared the heady mix of bad festive puns might be a bit too much for some of you.
No, really I did. Honest.
*koff*
Moving swiftly on for the last time in 2008; here are the pick of the gigs coming our way, freshly selected from the back pages of this week's bumper Christmas edition NME:
Of Montreal @ Digital, Brighton - 24/01/2009
Sky Larkin and Pulled Apart By Horses @ Audio, Brighton - 30/01/2009
Emmy The Great @ Komedia, Brighton - 02/02/2009
The Twang @ The Old Fire Station, Bournemouth - 03/02/2009
Fighting With Wire @ iBar, Bournemouth - 04/02/2009
The Coast @ Audio, Brighton - 04/02/2009
Fighting With Wire @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth - 06/02/2009
Fighting With Wire @ Hamptons, Southampton - 07/02/2009
Stricken City @ The Freebutt, Brighton - 11/02/2009
Stricken City @ Lennons, Southampton - 14/02/2009
Alkaline Trio and The Audition @ The Guildhall, Southampton - 15/02/2009
Secret Machines @ Digital, Brighton - 17/02/2009
Hockney, Passion Pit and Bear Hands @ Audio, Brighton - 17/02/2009
Late Of The Pier and Micachu @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portmouth - 20/02/2009
The View @ Southampton University Student Union - 22/02/2009
General Fiasco @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth - 22/02/2009
The Spinto Band @ The Joiners, Southampton - 27/02/2009
School Of Seven Bells @ Audio, Brighton - 01/03/2009
The Ting Tings @ The Guildhall, Portsmouth - 05/03/2009
Fall Out Boy @ The Brighton Centre - 08/03/2008
Goldie Lookin' Chain @ Concorde 2, Brighton - 23/03/2009
Goldie Lookin' Chain @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth - 25/03/2009
Bat For Lashes @ The Corn Exchange, Brighton - 16/04/2009
65daysofstatic @ The Talking Heads, Southampton - 25/04/2009
If you fear the outlaws may drive you mad over the Christmas period, or that you'll over-indulge with the Quality Street, or find you've watched The Great Escape that one time too many and are in dire need of leaving the house for an evening, then have no fear; I've perused the net and found the following gigs taking place during the forthcoming festivities...
19/12/2008
The Bog Rolling Stones @ The Brook, Southampton
Rusty Sheriff @ Little Johnny Russell's, Portsmouth
Viatrophy, Gehenna VII VII VII and In Her Ruin @ The Joiners, Southampton
The Visitors, Loz Bridge & The Box Social and Emily Barker @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth
Julian Nicholas' Heavy Plant Crossing @ Komedia, Brighton
The Booze Brothers @ The Rifle Club, Portsmouth
The Fabulous Rockman @ The Railway, Winchester
Amy MacDonald @ The Guildhall, Southampton
Zetan Spore @ The Fawcett Inn, Portsmouth
Roadhouse @ The Firehouse, Southampton
20/12/2008
Installation, Hijera and Zoo Zero @ The Joiners, Southampton
Perfect Alibi (Pink Floyd tribute) @ The Opera House, Bournemouth
Steve Arnott @ The Frog & Frigate, Southampton
The Ben Waters Band and The Spike Drivers @ Ashcroft Arts Centre, Fareham
Pencil Riot, The Bluescreen Of Death and Rosenkrantz @ The Hobbit, Southampton
Chicago Nine @ The RMA Tavern, Portsmouth
Rufus Stone @ The Brook, Southampton
The Reason @ The Railway, Winchester
Lynchpin @ The Firehouse, Southampton
21/12/2008
Speed The Collapse, Tigre Bite Tigre and Faireway @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth
Furthest Drive Home, Out Of Sight and Skyline Heroes @ The Joiners, Southampton
Jools Holland and His Rhythm & Blues Orchestra @ BIC (Windsor Hall), Bournemouth
Brontide, Sion and Great Walls @ The Railway, Winchester
Gentle Bren (DJ) @ Little Johnny Russell's, Portsmouth
Jezebell @ The Platform Tavern, Southampton
The Damned @ Komedia, Brighton
22/12/2008
The Damned @ Komedia, Brighton
Kodiak Jack @ Havana Bar, Southsea
Lost On Landing, Not Advised and Burn The Fleet @ The Joiners, Southampton
Sensational Alex Harvey Band @ Concorde 2, Brighton
23/12/2008
The Jamm (tribute) @ The Opera House, Bournemouth
Inklings @ The Joiners, Southampton
The Bog Rolling Stones @ Little Johnny Russell's, Portsmouth
Status Quo @ BIC (Windsor Hall), Bournemouth
I See Sparks @ The Railway, Winchester
Bad Manners @ Concorde 2, Brighton
24/12/2008
Stone Free, Dave Miatt and Joe Parker @ The Hobbit, Southampton
Santa Gold (DJ) @ Little Johnny Russell's, Portsmouth
Rebel Yell (tribute) @ Chicago Rock Cafe, Fareham
The Silver Beatles (tribute) @ The Brook, Southampton
27/12/2008
Autons, Shegotsick and Night Of Treason @ Moodeaze, Gosport
Cream of Clapton (tribute) @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth
Stickee Ickee (DJ) @ The Hobbit, Southampton
Great Pretender (Queen tribute) @ The Opera House, Bournemouth
Red Indie with Dr Watson (DJ) and Skidmark (DJ) @ Little Johnny Russell's, Portsmouth
The Vegas @ The Joiners, Southampton
Mary Jane @ The RMA Tavern, Portsmouth
Timebomb @ The Brook, Southampton
28/12/2008
Clym Arnold & The Delta Breaks, The Lonely Cardinals and The B Of The Bang @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth
White Knuckle Revolution, Deity and Minds Gone Blank @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth
Crossfire, The Realists and Castillo @ The Joiners, Southampton
Gentle Bren (DJ) @ Little Johnny Russell's, Portsmouth
29/12/2008
All New Comics @ The Joiners, Southampton
Kojak's Revenge @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth
Max Hayes @ The Hobbit, Southampton
30/12/2008
Remain Silenced, Typheous and Boilith @ The Joiners, Southampton
Eric Prydz (DJ) @ The Opera House, Bournemouth
Dragon Eye Morrison, Little London and Cut The Blue Wire @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth
31/12/2008
Burn The Fleet, Science Of Eight Limbs and Venice Ahoy @ The Joiners, Southampton
The Bog Rolling Stones @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth
Valhalla @ The Firehouse, Southampton
...and here are gigs in the new year that you may want to add to your diary...
Miles From Anywhere, The White Coats and No Access @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth - 02/01/2009
Tiny Spark @ The Cellars at Eastney, Portsmouth - 03/01/2009
One Weird Fish @ The Square Brewery, Petersfield - 03/01/2009
Get Your Ass To Mars @ The Railway, Winchester - 03/01/2009
Mindless Self Indulgence, Bring Me The Horizon and Black Tide @ The Guildhall, Southampton - 18/01/2009
[spunge] @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth - 09/03/2009
You Me At Six @ The Pyramids, Portsmouth - 12/03/2009
And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead @ The Wedgewood Rooms, Portsmouth - 14/04/2009
Tonight Indie club night Waster will break out the snow machines for more winter mayhem at Liquid Envy, with Will Chump (Chaos) and Philip Harvey (HKGC) of the Southsea Mafia DJs supplying the tunes. There'll be plenty of tinsel and sparkly lights as well, plus the chance for one lucky punter to win a fridge full of Kick energy drink (just the thing for a Christmas hangover). Doors open from 2200, with admission £2.20 before 2300, rising to £3.20 after. Further details can be found on the event's Facebook page.
The Wedgewoods Rooms goes back in time tomorrow night, Friday 19th December, when retro night It's A Sin fires into life. DJs Monsieur Dangerous and Carlos De Lemona will be raiding the vinyl under the stairs for a heady mix of oldies and goldies; doors open from 2300 and admission is FREE!
The Hong Kong Gardeners Club have lined up an evening of live music at Southsea's Havana Bar on Boxing Day, just the thing to cure the cure the post-Christmas blues. As well as sets from Joe Black, Thos Henley and Balk Fiction you'll also be able to savour the DJing skills of Myke Eales (Aspect) and Andy Summerly (from The Strange Death of Liberal England). Doors open from 2000, admission is £3 on the door.
Hipshaker hot-steps it into Christmas this Saturday, 20th December, with a seasonal offering of classic 60s funk and soul served up by the resident Hipshaker DJs plus live music from Pompey surf/punk outfit Emptifish. Doors open at The Wedgewood Rooms at 2130, admission is £5.
The Macabret will be taking over The Edge of The Wedge this Monday, 22nd December, for an winter's evening of burlesque entertainment in aid of All Saints Hostel. In addition to performances from Ms Honour Mission and Ms Ruby Red there'll also be live music from Joe Black and Kelly Kemp. Admission is £4, doors from 2000-2330 and it's over 18s only.
Contact returns to South Parade Pier this New Year's Eve with sets from guest DJs Uberdruck, Chris Liberator, DJ X and A+D+A+M, plus residents Matt Handy, Gav Ravenous and Nathan D & Lanslide. Tickets are £25 in advance from from Ticketweb, doors open from 2100, with music through till 0400.
The Wedgewood Rooms hosts A Night For Joe Strummer on Tuesday, 23rd December, with all profits donated to Strummerville, the Joe Strummer Foundation for New Music. The line-up so far features The Racketeers, The Good Time Charlies, TFA and Archive 45, with further acts to be announced. Doors from 1930, tickets are £8 in advance.
Chaos will be celebrating Christmas in style this year, with two events at the The Wedgewood Rooms next week. First up is a cracker of a Christmas Eve special, featuring live music from Kill Kasper, Wyldside and Tricorn plus DJs Hev Stillet-Hoe and Ruby Soho. Then, if your liver has recovered from all the yuletide excess, Will Chump and DJ Lemon will be seeing in 2009 a few days early with The Alternative New Year Party on Saturday 27th December. Admission is £5 for either night; doors open from 2200 on the 27th, from 2100 on Christmas Eve.
Club night Kiss My Bass have planned the mother of all New Year's Eve parties at Southsea's Havana Bar, guaranteed to see 2009 in with a bang. DJs Charge and Tom Mayhem (Ricochet) will be joining residents Udy, Vol.1, Eratik Behaviour, Neil Doc and Fotza for an all-night session, with a live beatbox countdown to the New Year courtesy of Ochs. A new sound system and lighting rig are promised, plus the DJs have been told anything goes, so it's going to be large. Tickets are available in advance from the venue, or online from the Portsmouth page at http://www.dontstayin.com, priced at £8. The fun starts at 2100 and runs through to 0500. Oh lordy.
And that's it for the Gigwatcher for 2008; today I have mostly been listening to Pearl Jam, Muse and Kodiak Jack (with the Bo Selecta Proper Chrimbo tune on random for good measure). Thanks for putting up with my drivel landing in your inboxes or taking the time to read it on the blog, I hope Santa brings you all something very special (I've asked for Cheryl Tweedy again, fingers crossed) and not that CD by The Priests (which is a total rip off as it doesn't have My Lovely Horse on it). Be sure to join me in the New Year when I'll be breaking that resolution I foolishly made in a rare sober moment.
:o)
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